Thursday, March 12, 2015

On Cunty Consistency

March 10th:
9:30 a.m.: Arrive to the office.
9:35 a.m.: Get call from Bossman #1 that there's something super urgent I need to work on with him. We work on it all day.
3:25 p.m.: Give the document to our director (in the presence of Bossman #1). Director says, "It's perfect, please email it to me. Thanks." I left her office in such a hurry (as I thought expedience in getting this emailed to her was more important than curtseying and kissing the ring with a "You're welcome" in reply to her thank you). As I exited, I was about 2-3 feet from her office, when I heard her passively-aggressively snarl out, "YOU'RE WELCOME."
3:30 p.m.: I inform bossman of two things: "Did I hear her passively-aggressively blurt out "You're Welcome to me? (He replied, "You heard THAT?") I replied, "I hear EVERYTHING," and then I blurted out "HEY. I AM HUNGRY." And he says, "Go for your lunch!" (FINALLY)
4:15 p.m.: He walks into the break room in the dungeon, interrupting my Fortress of Solitude, and I launched into "Gee, it's nice to know that the fact I delayed my lunch by three and a half hours was greatly appreciated by her." And I brought up the "You're welcome" (and in my mind, if you're playing along at home, the voice in my head sounds like Large Marge from PeeWee's Big Adventure). 


I said, "Yanno, a four letter word, starting with C and ending with T really applies here." And he said, "Nope. Nope. I don't want to hear that word!" And I said, "I'm far too clever for you. The word that applies here is CURT." (He agreed.) He then replied, "Hey, she told you the document was PERFECT! I've never heard that I did anything perfectly!" My reply back to him was, "Well she fucked up the slap and tickle! Slap and tickle, you start with the negative, and conclude with something positive. She fucked up the compliment by being curt."

The final exchange here was his reply to that, "Well, at least "I" appreciate you!" And I said, "And to that, I say, thank you Good Sir! Right back atcha!"


March 11th:
After regaling my mother of the aforementioned exchange, without missing a beat she said, "Yeah... but still, you could have said you're welcome." 

I seriously am laughing at this and not steamed, because what she thinks matters so very little to me. But, I think if she ever did say something in the least bit SUPPORTIVE of me and my point of view, I think I'd keel over dead from abject shock.

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