Narcissist w/Destructive Tendencies + Crisis Mode = Perfect Storm

So yeah. She knocked on death's door, and thus far, death has not answered. Perhaps Death is a lot like me, sitting on the other side of the door saying to themselves, "Fuck that noise. What do THEY want? Fuck them!" and just not answer. And yes, I do this very thing. Because everyone wants something, either to sell me something, or get me involved in condo life shit. Fuck them And well, fuck my mother.

You'd think being so afraid to die and alternatively wanting so bad to die, then not, might have elicited a MODICUM of awareness of the finite nature of life, and perhaps for her to more wisely spend whatever allotted time she may have left. But sadly, no. She'd rather revert back to a raging bitch.

Perhaps in her raging and her demands, perhaps therein is an indication there's more fight left in her, perhaps more LIFE left in her. Perhaps. But at the moment, her not-so-inner narcissist is using all this time and drama to feed her ego, feed this incessant need to be the center of everyone's universe, making demands upon people's time and energy and empathy. My tank of empathy is now on "E." I cannot even imagine the hell my sister is in, and she is the one in the trenches on the front line, trying to slay this monster by herself. But again, that's a trap of her own design.

And again, about that awareness? My mother is so self unaware that she fails to realize how very lucky she is to have my sister local, to have my sister AT ALL, yet all she does is drain drain drain the empathy and good will, drain drain drain, call call call, complain complain complain. Fuck her. We all have lives of our own. Mom fails to realize that if it were not for my sister being here and caring and BEING THERE, and if "I" were the person running point on this, I'd go to a judge to get conservatorship, and slap her ass in a nursing facility quicker than you could say FUCK YOU. If it were up to me, she would have been in a nursing facility YEARS AGO.

Gotta feed the ego! Feed me! Feed me all night long... sing it along with me. This is the theme song. And if I can figure out how to make the FEED ME SEYMORE! FEED ME ALL NIGHT LONG as an mp3, I want this as my ring tone for my mother. And just like the plant in LSoH, my mother will not rest until she's consumed every last bit of my sister and her life giving blood. Fuck her. 

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L7SkrYF8lCU&feature=youtu.be